Monday, October 1, 2007

Assholery? Don't mind if I do!

Hypothesis: Girls love assholes.

I've long heard this little truism, and I understood the theory behind it (strong alpha males) but it wasn't until recently I saw proof with my own eyes.

Exposition: Lazer is delivering two bags full of delicious candy. A group of dumb Mexican girls are walking towards him.

Tall Bitch: Oooooohh! Candy! Can we have some?!

Lazer: (Without even batting an eye) You're not pretty enough. (He keeps walking)

2 seconds pass

Short Bitch: Ooh, you're mean...

Bitch Bitch: Fuck you.

The rest of my delivery run was pretty uneventful, unless you count being followed by hungry eyes (Read: Fat people's eyes) an event.

And then...

Lazer: (Working the store) What do you want?

Bitches: *Giggle giggle* *Shuffle away*

Needless to say they were putty at the tip of my penis.



Too bad they weren't pretty enough.

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