I will be your best friend.

I'm sure I've made it at least partially clear in the past that I have a "thing" for Lindsay Lohan.
Well, thanks to the media, it has also come to my attention that she has a sex-tape out now.


GET ME A COPY. ON DVD. A.S.A.P.

Seriously, the only computer access I have is in the lab, and I was paranoid enough looking at the screen captures without actually watching video footage of her going at it.

OH, if it makes you feel any better, I ONLY want the video to determine if it is or is not actually Lindsay Lohan. It's like science.

So do it.